Sunday, October 07, 2007

the lovefilled day


the past 24 hours have shown me how much i love the people in my life.
Keith came to visit me at work, we hung out, made fun of things. I've missed him so incredibly much, any time i get to spend with him is great. i can't help but feel like I'm repeating myself whenever i talk about him, but im not sure how else to describe my time with him without throwing my hands out like a giant hug. I'll see him in a few days, weeks, months, who knows. But i will talk to him everyday and tell him how much i love him everyday, thats all i can do. I really do trust him, after today I know theres no reason for me to be scared of another taking my place. I don't know if i ever was that incredibly scared of that, more afraid of him tiring of this semi-"long" distance commitment.
I put my sister to sleep last night while listening to Sigur Ros, she likes it. She means more to me than anything on this planet, and i'd give up everything i own to never have to ever see her suffer in any sort of way. I'm afraid of her growing up, learning to be independent, and learning to keep her heart safe. I can only hope that her mind and body will stay healthy as she gets older. If it's one thing we must all appreciate is our good health (if you have it).
I miss my grandparents and i'd really like to go stay with them for thanksgiving.
i feel like breaking down in tears of joy and sadness because all the people i've mentioned here are away or asleep, i'd like to hug them all right now though.


"while you are away
my heart comes undone
slowly unravels
in a ball of yarn
the devil collects it
with a grin
our love
in a ball of yarn"
-Bjork

p.s. i might be buying a macbook soon, only to build credit of course ;]

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