The Wait

It's been too long, dear old blog, I almost forgot all about you. Since we came back from California my life has been a total mess. I got a promotion at the cafe to Kitchen Manager/Partner, I deal with a whole lot more bullshit but the menu, specials, details, are mine. All mine. I've never been in charge before so it's been pretty stressful. Rallying your troops (inefficient employees) to actually work is the hardest part, I feel like a broken record. I see every eye roll, every scoff, I don't even care anymore. I have had to work at being a persistent bitch to everyone and it sucks, but it's really whats best. If you aren't, shit doesn't get done, plain and simple. I have a boss too though, so while I'm sometimes shitting on other people there is other shit to be shat upon me, constantly. I guess I don't work so well under stress, but I have yet to feel like I can't do it. I have certainly felt like I don't want to do it, but everyone does sometimes. Oh and my kitty is pregnant with more kitties (I'm necessarily upset about this, but I am stressing hard.)

People are giving me a hard time again, I don't want to be around them. At all. Connor and I are considering buying his parents home in a scenic county at least an hour away from any bullshit in Albany. 75,000$ for a 4 bedroom farmhouse with 7 acres. Seven acres of complete solitude. Chickens, dogs, pigs, we could have it all. I'm torn between being miserably poor near my family in California or eternally happy in exactly what I want, 3,000 miles away from anything connected to me since birth. Why can't I just have them both? In life you make decisions, most of them suck.