im currently using a mac computer at the house i babysit, its so beautiful i can't help but use it when i'm here. i love babysitting here because they have every technological advance from the last year. wii, ps3, apple tv, lcd screen microwave, etc. one day i hope my pictures will get me this life.
i got an A on my photo project in film class, my teacher shared it with everyone and i felt really embarrassed.
I took pictures of these little girls a month or so ago and their parents used the pictures on their christmas cards, i feel honored.
maybe this career is a good idea, maybe not.
i'm just scared of rejection of any kind, and i didn't realize it till now.
if i don't get into Parsons all my confidence about my pictures will dwindle into this shallow puddle.
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edit:8:53
i've changed my mind about today being just alright.
have you ever been so mad sad scared shocked that you needed to seriously take a break from thinking just to take a breath and stop yourself from having a heart attack? im not going to blow this off, this is a big fucking deal. i can't fucking believe it. i want to cry and its not because im sad, this anger has literally stopped my heart from beating normally.
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edit:9:32
i wish i could stay mad at you.
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