the name

I went back and read a bunch of my posts, some remind me of happier times, others remind me of when I was completely ridiculous, and others remind me of my fits of instant rage.

I noticed that i have mentioned Jake's name in about 17 posts. We have a strange relationship that is too hard to explain, and too intricate for you to understand. It's actually not that hard to explain, maybe it's just too weird. If you've ever seen the movie A Lot Like Love, you will understand mine and Jake's relationship. He is someone who comes in and out of my life, who I will always love.

Sometimes he stays longer than others, but no matter how many times he comes and goes, i will always feel the same happiness when he comes back. I love him as a best friend, as a confidant, as the only person who I would ever consider marrying (because we would have so much fun). He's the only reason why I have unlimited text messaging, and the only person who makes me giggle every time he tells me I'm cute. Just the thought of cuddling up next to him in a few weeks makes me smile. He gets me out of bad moods, and answers his phone when I am crying, and then tells me stories about how many girls he's chasing. I don't hate the girls he falls in love with because I'm jealous, I hate them because they can't possibly see the Jake that I do. I know they don't see the Jake that gives them gum and high-fives.

I love you, and I always will.

"And besides, you're probably holding hands,
With some skinny, pretty girl,
That likes to talk about bands,
And all I want to do is ride bikes with you
And stay up late and watch cartoons."