up teh punx

When i was 13, my grandma and I rented SLC Punk. She took about 10 minutes of it and went to bed, she'd already seen all of it in real life with my uncle Shaun or something. I stayed glued to my seat like my eyes had never seen anything more beautiful. In all honesty, i didn't understand most of it then, but i knew what Steve-O was getting at. It changed my life so incredibly much, it created the very foundations of my anger.
As a girl it sucks to be pissed. You can't go to shows and thrash on someone's face, you'll probably get laughed at or not taken seriously. I guess i showed it in different ways. In middle school everyone thought i was sheltered, and to this day, some people still think i was. In all actually I've seen and been through more shit in my life than most of these assholes combined. I just didn't go around crying about it my entire life, does that make me sheltered? My parents kept and still keep a watchful eye on me but they never stopped me from doing anything, never in a million years would a sheltered child be able to go on their 18th birthday and get a tattoo as big as i did. I like the way my parents raised me, they kept me out of a lot of shit, and I love the person I am today. Thats not saying I never got in trouble with drugs or school or misbehaving, because good lord, I did.

I'm just as angry now, if not more, than I was 4 years ago. I've just redirected it into more sensible terms and reasons. SLC Punk was the reason I moved away from Hawaii, I came home from that summer, realized everything sucked and I wanted a place to start over. So we moved to New Mexico and learned that shit sucks no matter where you are, until you make it not suck.

I've never in my entire life walked around with my head hung low because I never had a father, or because we lived in the ghetto where our neighbor beat his girlfriend with a baseball bat in the middle of the street, or because we moved so fucking much. I walk around pissed because i feel like everyone i've met in the last five years (with a few exceptions) and everyone i will meet in the next five, are gigantic piles of shit. Nothing taught me this better than SLC Punk.