My dear blogger, you are always here for me when I need you.
I've been in Yosemite an official month now, it doesn't feel much different from the first week. I'm still getting used to my new reality. I changed location and job again, which makes it feel like I'm living in new chapter in the book, and I'm not quite sure who I am in it yet. I've been letting past thoughts I'd ridden myself of, return, and it feels just as discouraging and heartbreaking as the first time. I filled my lonely thoughts for three months by excessively working and doing fitness things, I changed my eating habits and lost 20 pounds by the end of it. It's been almost 3 weeks since I've been to the gym and the thought of sitting the this house another day after work is really depressing.
Finally I made friends where I was and was regularly doing things, DATING, which was fun for a while. I'm here now, and I'm making excuses to sit in the house and get high instead of being creative with it and going outside. Now the house has this puppy, which I'm half expected to watch while they're at work or let it whine and piss behind a gate for 10 hours. It's been a rough work week, tomorrow is my Friday until I go to the Bay Area for four days tomorrow night. I get to see two of my favorite bands in the same four days and eat at a restaurant I've wanted to go to. Going home always clears my thoughts and puts my tunnel vision back into centered perspective.
I am craving attention from SOMETHING, someone, I can admit it.
I've been in Yosemite an official month now, it doesn't feel much different from the first week. I'm still getting used to my new reality. I changed location and job again, which makes it feel like I'm living in new chapter in the book, and I'm not quite sure who I am in it yet. I've been letting past thoughts I'd ridden myself of, return, and it feels just as discouraging and heartbreaking as the first time. I filled my lonely thoughts for three months by excessively working and doing fitness things, I changed my eating habits and lost 20 pounds by the end of it. It's been almost 3 weeks since I've been to the gym and the thought of sitting the this house another day after work is really depressing.
Finally I made friends where I was and was regularly doing things, DATING, which was fun for a while. I'm here now, and I'm making excuses to sit in the house and get high instead of being creative with it and going outside. Now the house has this puppy, which I'm half expected to watch while they're at work or let it whine and piss behind a gate for 10 hours. It's been a rough work week, tomorrow is my Friday until I go to the Bay Area for four days tomorrow night. I get to see two of my favorite bands in the same four days and eat at a restaurant I've wanted to go to. Going home always clears my thoughts and puts my tunnel vision back into centered perspective.
I am craving attention from SOMETHING, someone, I can admit it.
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