The Final Product

The final product of my personal life ruining is dull. New York is not anything like what I dreamt about for years. To be honest with you its like Portland with more people and lots of unnessesary advertising. I really miss it there, even the shitty hipsters. I go to work most days at 3am and work between 10 and 13 hours a day. I like the job, just not the hours or my sexist, extremely Italian, boss. It is not at all glamorous, most of the people who work there are over 40, except for the sluts who close at night in the cafe.
Maybe I will convince Josh to move back if the band goes sour, but I doubt it. I feel a little trapped. I don't have a car yet, either. I'm currently at the band practice, but going to these make me angry because its mostly them fucking around and playing a few songs every few minutes. It makes me feel silly for moving out here so Josh could play with them again. I really miss Safeway and nice people, even if they were a little fake. Maybe I just need to toughen up.

Things are really hard right now.
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