the wierdness

im torn, really.
i dont want to come home, at all. i dont want to go back to living in that house, or going back to work. i miss keith a lot, and i miss hanging out with candace tremendously.
i love portland, i love the downtown and especially hawthorne district. i want to move up here after high school possibly, but i promised a bunch of people i would apply to USF. god, i will never get i, its a waste of time and money. i dont know whats going to happen with keith and I, either. i dont want to live with my parents either, so portland seems like my only option.
everythings so wierd right now.